Hump Day DANG Bag: Going Home is Never Easy

we’re blogging pantless

like NFL’s Chris Cooley:

what the fuck was he thinking?

by the way, this is my assistant

We must get high first.zzzz0000000o000O0000OOOm zoom

That’s better.

“The Rabbit Catcher” for Tommy

by Jess Paps

One of my favorite poems, a favorite of Tommy’s too, is “The Rabbit Catcher” by Sylvia Plath.  The poem symbolically marks the end of her marriage to Ted Hughes and the beginning of a new poetic voice and style. The following passage is entirely from a book I’m reading called Her Husband by Diane Middlebrook, in which the author is fascinated by the dialogue that occured between the two poets in their work. They often borrowed and altered images from each other’s work to communicate in highly personal puzzles- The Rabbit Catcher is one example. Enjoy!

better than drugs

WAHHH WAAHHHH

Bored in Brooklyn? Boo! Be Brave and Bring by the Booze! – m4w – 33 (Brand new to Brooklyn!)

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Reply to: pers-4hkrf-1207388077@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-06-05, 6:12PM EDT

Something Exciting for this Evening or Weekend w/ Handsome EU Guy?…
European, Caucasian, 6′ 2″, 200 lbs, light brown hair, green eyes and very athletic looking.
Interests: The Arts & Architecture, History, Western philosophy, current affairs, finance, science, geography, …..good talks.
Enjoy going to museums, theaters, parks, nature and animals, classical music, traveling, Mediterranean cuisine but open to other flavors …

Location: Brand new to Brooklyn!

Fanny Och Alexander

By Jess

I’ve found that some of the most difficult life moments occur in those quiet nighttime hours before bed- when the mind runs where it will, without distraction, and forces reflection (often self criticism) on our day, our life, and the shape things take.

One way I’ve learned to cope with obsessive and anxious nighttime thoughts is to watch a film– and in that escape or fantasy, I have learned to allow myself complete happiness and containment, even if it’s only for two hours.

Last night I watched Fanny and Alexander, Ingmar Bergman’s 1982 homage to his early 20th Century childhood. The film was intended to be and was Bergman’s last. He is my favorite director and as usual his story centers on family, existentialism, love, death, materialism, class and gender role struggle, the destruction of traditional marriage, etc… all from the vantage point of himself as a child and as an elderly director at the end of a long career.

Cream of the Creep: The Dregs of Craigslist

Hey I puked all over myself! – m4w

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Date: 2009-05-26, 12:25PM EDT
Hey remember me, I’m the ginger who puked on myself? I’m sure you remember me because I was aggressively hitting on you using the fact that I had just vomited as a pick up line. Even though my eyes were watering and I was wearing my barf for a beard I could tell you were into me. You were dark haired and from what I could over here you talking to the bartender about your name is Gwen and you bartend over at Santo’s. That guy was a total lame wad hipster, he totally killed our vibe. Get back to me soon because I spend the better part of my summer following the Black Crows tour selling pipes

.

Cute ConED (possibly Scam artist) Guy – m4m – 24 (Brooklyn)

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Date: 2009-05-26, 7:18PM EDT

On Friday evening you stopped by my apartment asking if we wanted a reduction in our energy bill. One of my roommates had to go get our coned info and you told me and my friend (who is straight) that we looked pretty fly. You also said we smelled good. You seemed like you were flirting? Maybe I was just high? Maybe you were too?

A positive message from 1984

Today Mr. T turns 57! Happy Birthday Mr. T! Now that I revisit you I think you might have a mental illness but that’s beside the point… I thought I’d use yr b-day as an opportunity to share one of your greatest contributions to pop culture- and one of my favorite songs: Treat Your Mother Right!

“Mother–

There is no other

Like Mother

So treat Her right

Mother,

I always Love Her

My Mother

So treat Her right, treat her right!

Random, Angry and Absurd: The Best of Craigslist’s Rants and Raves

Hunted and Gathered by Jess Paps

Latest Face Transplant Revealed!

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Reply to: pers-rjnqk-1157485624@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-05-06, 1:11PM EDT

Unfortunately, it was a total failure.

haha

women weight age

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Reply to: pers-snbts-1157787860@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-05-06, 3:52PM EDT

you can have high numbers in one or the other
if a woman is over 150 lbs, she should be under 25 years
if she is over 25 years, she should be less than 150lbs
weight/age

hmmmn. idontgetit

REALLY, England? The First?

by Jess Paps

Carol Ann Duffy has been named as the new Poet Laureate of the United Kingdom, the first woman to be appointed in the 341-year history of the post.

The author, who is best known for her collection The World’s Wife, is also the first Scot to be named Laureate. Duffy said she felt “very honoured and humbled” by her appointment.

The poet told BBC Radio 4′s Woman’s Hour she had thought “long and hard” about taking the appointment. “I look on it as a recognition of the great woman poets we have writing now,” she said. “I’ve decided to accept it for that reason.”

Duffy was allegedly ruled out of the running for the Laureate post in 1999 because Tony Blair thought her sexuality might not play well in Middle England.

Her first themed collection, The World’s Wife, spoke of great men, myths and moments in history through the women in the background. It included poems called Mrs Midas and Queen Kong.

source: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/8027767.stm

Jess Paps for GOOP: Recording vs. Experiencing

Hi Guys,

It seems like every time I go to a museum, mostly the bigger ones, I’m struck by how many people are photographing the art rather than just looking at it. I’m not talking about taking a picture of, or next to, your favorite painting. I’m talking about walking through a museum and taking a picture of almost everything you “see.” As if to say: I WAS HERE. THIS HAPPENED. I SAW THIS. It got me thinking about this idea that people are obsessed nowadays with documenting/recording life- so much so that they are failing to experience it. Then came Twitter and it seemed similar. Something happens, you tell everyone. Something is discovered, you share it with everyone. (I EXIST. THIS HAPPENED.) I probably should have thought about this more, because it’s way more complex than I’m gonna go over a salad on my lunch break, but again recording the now versus staying in the now. Is it loneliness? Is it our fear of death- this illusion that we are making ourselves intangible and immortal. I think Freud would agree with that.

Part of the appeal, for me at least, is the feeling that something doesn’t matter until I tell others about it. They look at me and say good job and I understand I did a good job. (Or am funny or am cool or was the first to know). This is basic psych 101 Mirroring. The internet is our sounding board.

Be Careful America…

“Definitely running…definitely going after mayor of LA and at least governor, but I’ll probably stop at governor. I mean if people were really pushing for me [to run for president] at that point, I’ll probably have to step into that role. That pressure may be a little much. I’ll start with California because I love California so much, that I could have that passion for my state and my birthplace.”  -Spencer Pratt

“Jesus and I are making the connection.” -Spencer Pratt

Cream of the Creep: The Best of Craigslist

by Jess Paps

Random Girl that Peed While I was Showering: Thanks for not doing a 2 – m4w

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Reply to: pers-4vdfa-1108704792@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-04-05, 7:56PM EDT

Time: 9:30 Friday Morning
Me: Brown hair, blue eyes tall and athletic
You: Straight brown hair, green around the gills, pretty hot if you weren’t that hung over

I was taking my morning shower getting ready for work and I thought I heard the door creak open. I ignored it because I didn’t think anyone was home. A few seconds later I hear someone un-zip and pop a squat. I peaked around the shower curtain and caught you peeing in my bathroom. With no easy access to a towel and having only been up for 3 minutes I just pretended that you weren’t there much like you probably didn’t notice that the shower was on and running.

I heard my front door creak closed and wondered how you got in since it was locked… I had a few things meander through my mind so in case you were wondering here are my top 10:

1. Who the fuck are you?
2. How did you get into my apartment?
3. Thank you for not flushing
4. Thank you for not dropping a 2
5. Thank you for not stealing my mail or computer
6. Did you want to stay for breakfast?
7. Will you be dropping by again? I’ll make sure to leave the bathroom open from 9-10
8. Are you ok?
9. Did you realize there was someone in the bathroom?
10. Sorry it was such a mess, I’ve since cleaned it so the next time you drop by there is a fresh batch of potpourri.
Thanks for the story.

Oh, Narrows Animal Hospital Girl… – m4w – 27 (Bay Ridge)

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Reply to: pers-8xy3n-1105857589@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-04-03, 5:38PM EDT

You are the receptionist. A beautiful, petite, delicious Latina… Oh your tight, tiny little body (errr). Is it that cute stone on your nose? Is it your smooth dark skin? Is it the pin straight hair?

No, you have what every man wants – the body of a high school girl (!) and the maturity and experience of someone twice that age.

Does anyone know the girl to which I refer? Thoughts? By the way, not a stalker, just reflecting on a positive experience….

It is Womyns History Month

by Jess Paps

I thought I’d use it as an opportunity to recognize a some influential female musicians.  Add yrs too!